Last weekend I attended a Freedom Conference through my church. In today's episode, I recap my own discoveries that any leader should keep in mind when on their own journey to success.
You may access Episode 3 by clicking the audio link or read the transcript below.
TRANSCRIPT OF AUDIO
Season 2018 | Episode 3
How Committed are you to Your Success?
Well, hello, everyone. Welcome back to Episode 3 of - I guess, I can officially say this is a podcast. I am Tasha Scott, Your Success Connector.
First of all, I have to pause right here. Yesterday I just got my approval for iTunes, so it's official, y'all. We're really doing this in 2018.
For those of you all who are just tuning in for the first time, my name again is Tasha Scott and I am a motivational speaker, trainer, and coach. And I am passionate about helping leaders to transform their lives and their businesses. We've been on this journey now for three weeks. This month the theme of this is all about, basically, reinventing yourselves for the new year.
Today I want to talk about this whole topic of how committed are you to your success. I had to answer this for myself as well. Recently - I don't want to say recently. Last weekend I had the most amazing experience. Our church is a big church that's made up of small groups, and one of the small groups that I went through at the end of last year is a group called Freedom. This was my second time going through Freedom. The first time I went through was about two years ago, and I was in a different season of life, a different place; but it definitely was something that I needed during that transitional time.
This past year I decided it was time for me to take it again because y'all know sometimes we get complacent in areas of our lives and not every area, but sometimes we just, we need a recharging. We need a refreshing. We need a re-boost. I went through Freedom again. And then at the end of this semester, when we do the Freedom small group, we also have what's called a Freedom Conference.
This is a spoiler alert so if you go to my church or you are getting ready to do it, I'm sorry, I'm getting ready to share some of my experiences, and I will try my best not to ruin the experience for you; which by the way, everybody has their own experience.
But at the retreats. I'll just say that answering this question, how committed are you to your success, I had to recommit to God, to myself, to my dream, to my vision, everything. And at the Freedom Conference, it really deals a lot with the inside of you. I realized that there were some commitment issues. It's so funny because you think once you experience Freedom once, you think, "Well, surely I'm just going to grow to the next level," but what I'm finding, y'all, is this is a maintenance thing. Like, this is not a once-and-done-type thing. This is something that we have to proactively be committed to. This a work in progress.
Let me just kind of share. They broke everything down by sessions, and the first one was dealing with pride. Sometimes when we hear the word "pride" we instantly think about, "Oh, that person's haughty," or, "That person's boastful." But did you know that sometimes pride could be thinking less of yourself or holding yourself back in an area?
I think I've shared this. Maybe I haven't. I remember when I was in school I used to always just be an average student. I didn't really try. I got Bs and Cs. I didn't really study, didn't really apply myself because for some reason I did not like to stand out. I did everything I could
to not stand out. I know it sounds crazy, but even being an A student I didn't really put myself out there, so I settled for average.
I had to think about that. Right now in this kind of season where have I let pride come in, where I have held myself back or thought too low of myself in areas. That first session, we had to deal with it. And I had to actually just say, "You know what? I lay down that pride, I lay down that need to be perfect and embrace who I am."
Again, I know this sounds crazy because sometimes we can be so into the works of what we're doing, and we can be doing great things, but sometimes we just need to check ourselves. And for me, that first session was really about checking myself. It was about checking "Okay, Tasha, is there any area of your life where you're knowing and unknowing holding yourself back, thinking too low of yourself?" And I had to address that and I had to renounce that.
The second area was rejection. A lot of times when we have been offended, when we have - especially if there are roots of that already, that rejection - that pride again. Can't get away from that. That pride will cause us to build walls, walls of self-protection, walls to keep people out. But the danger of that is when we build the walls - and that's that pride again. When we build the walls because we are trying to guard ourselves against rejection, what we're really doing - I know this is going to sound really bad, but what we're really doing is we're building ourselves a prison for ourselves. We're trapping ourselves in.
That was another area that they talked about, is dealing with that rejection and getting it out of us. And again, one and two they went hand in hand. So dealing with that issue of pride, not thinking too low of ourselves, and then with the rejection thing what I had to do was I literally had to deal with the roots of emotional detachment in areas. And when I looked at it, it was rejection, fear of rejection. Sometimes we carry that over into our businesses; right,
We have an idea, we have a vision, but that pride and that root of rejection will cause us to withhold ourselves from opportunities, withhold ourselves from associating or networking with different people, or even going after certain clients because we're afraid of that rejection and we'll do anything we can. We'll build the walls. We'll safeguard ourselves and self-protect.
But I am a person of faith, and I just - again, I had to get to the place where I said, "God I give this to you. I lay this down. I renounce this. I do not want to be hindered by this."
I won't go through all the sessions but just ones that kind of stood out to me. Later on in the afternoon - Oh! Oh! Let me go back. Oh my gosh, I can't forget about this one. This one session they talked about abuse. Abuse can come in all different forms: emotional abuse, spiritual abuse. There is even physical and verbal, all of that.
But there was one area, y'all. I cried throughout a lot of this. But there was one area where this man and this woman got up and they literally read letters of apology and they stood in the gap for all of the people who hurt us, who offended us, and basically said, "I'm sorry."
And that was such a powerful, powerful thing because how many of us - be honest, you're sitting on the other side listening to this so nobody's seeing you right now. But how many of us are holding ourselves hostage because we just wanted that person or those people to just admit that they did wrong or admit that they offended us, admit that they were wrong? And we just wanted to hear them say I'm sorry. How many of us just needed that?
Y'all when they were speaking those words, the guy was saying, "I represent every man in your life." The woman was saying, "I represent every woman in your life." And they went through, and it's like they cleared the slate and they said, "I'm sorry."
I closed my eyes when they were reading that and I literally, it was like the movie reel played in my life, Y'all, it was so powerful, so powerful.
On one of the other sessions, they talked about shame. And again, I have to say that a lot of times we're in business, we're in our careers and we don't realize just how much these things - the shame, the guilt, the pride, unforgiveness - we don't realize how much those things affect us and they affect our productivity. They affect our progress. We'll have the dreams. We'll have the visions, but for some reason, we can't go forward
I would honestly say, especially coming out of that conference, that sometimes we just need to check ourselves and see is there any lingering shame? Is there any lingering guilt or pride? Are we harboring unforgiveness because those things, again, like I said earlier, they will create walls that if we're not careful we think the walls are to keep people out and to protect ourselves, but honestly what they're doing is they're imprisoning us?
This I'm telling y'all was such a powerful, powerful event for me, and it was a reminder. It's not something that I didn't know. It's not something that I didn't have to do before. But at the beginning of 2018, I challenge you. I challenge you to check your lives.
We go to the doctors and we have physicals. We go to the dentist for our teeth cleanings and our maintenance. We even go to the mechanic and get our oil changes and make sure that our cars are running.
But I just challenge you at the beginning of this year - or even if you're listening to this and it's the middle of the year or it's the end of the year. No matter what, I just challenge you
I'm challenging myself to just make sure. And our mental health, our emotional health - I was talking to a friend who's a counselor and she said, "Tasha, sometimes a lot of people think that when you go to counselors that it's only when you're in crisis mode. But sometimes we need to get to a place where we're not just in crisis mode. We're in preventive maintenance mode."
For me, that is my faith, that is - I do church, but I also surround myself with people like that, counselors, life coaches, friends, my family, all of that stuff because at the end of the day I'm worth it. You're worth it.
Especially if you're in a place where you're in a position of leadership for business, ministry, or you're mentoring people. Even if you're - you may not have the title of leader, you may not have the title of manager or supervisor or boss or influencer, but every last one of us owes it to ourselves to make sure that we're just checking ourselves. We're doing routine checks, and we're constantly doing maintenance to make sure that we are really healed and delivered from shame, from guilt, from pride, from unforgiveness, and I would even say from the blaming of others. We were made for freedom, y'all. This is the perfect title for this conference. We were made for freedom. Some days it might feel like you have to fight for it, but it's worth the fight!
Today, I just I'm sharing what every entrepreneur, what every professional, what every person should consider when you're thinking about your journey of success. All of these things that I just mentioned really came from the question how committed am I to my success, and I'd have to say for me commitment comes in the form of that self-care. Again, I'm not talking about self-care to the point where we're isolating ourselves. I'm talking about to the place where we're operating in a place of freedom, from a place of victory. I hope that makes sense.
I just want to challenge you. I said this in the last one and I'm going to repeat it. If you are in a place where you are dealing with something and you know that it's beyond your control, you know that for some reason you can't get over it, it's been lingering, it's even affecting your productivity, it may even feel like depression. It may be depression. What I challenge you today is do not - and I said this last week, I'm going to say it again.
Do not suffer in silence.
Part of the freedom that I'm talking about today is being able to let pride go and ask for help. I'm going to keep saying this. I'm probably going to sound like a broken record but somebody needs to hear this and somebody just needs to be reminded that you do not have to be held hostage to guilt, to shame, to pride, to unforgiveness, that it is possible for you to live in freedom.
I told you for me there are the areas that I have to have in place. My faith. I have to be surrounded, I'm a strong believer. There are certain things that I just have to have in place. I have to have people in place. Not only do I have my faith, I have professionals that help me. It takes a village, y'all. It takes a village.
I just wanted to share that with you. If you're just tuning in, my name is Tasha Scott. I'm a motivational speaker, trainer, and coach. And this is a brand new podcast that I've started this year called "Your Success Connector."
I'm just on a mission to help professionals, business people, leaders to transform their lives and their businesses. Success is relative to the individual, but all of us - every last one of us have the potential to be successful in the area of freedom. I hope this helped you. I pray it blessed you. Thank you for tuning in.
If this helped you today, will you do me a favor? Will you reach out? Will you let me know? I'm on Facebook. My handle is @coachtashascott. I am on Instagram. I'm on YouTube. Wherever you're listening to this, however, contact me. You can even email me. It's firstname.lastname@example.org.
And I would love to hear how this blessed you or what step are you going to take so that you can commit to yourself so that you could commit to the dream and the vision in this year, 2018.
Whatever it looks like for you. I'd love to hear from you. Thank you so much for tuning in and I will see you on our next episode of Your Success Connector.
Have a great day walking in freedom.
About Tasha M. Scott
Tasha M. Scott is a Motivational Speaker, Trainer, Author, and Certified Coach. She is the author of two books: Don’t Limit Me and Maximize Your Existence; and she is a member of the John Maxwell Team and a Book Yourself Solid™ Certified Coach.